Commenting: GIJoe publicity

So you've probably seen them by now, right? Promo stills are beginning to circulate for the 2009 release of that other Hasbro vehicle, G.I.Joe. I won't lie to you: I loved it when I was little. And I was also pleased to find that the cartoon stood up to the test of time. Sure there are a few corny episodes but on the whole the stories they told are pretty good even by today's standards. I don't know that anybody cares but every time a little bit of news crops up fanboys suddenly get up in arms and scream bloody murder.

But rather than go into a flame war, I figure this'll be easier if I just make my analysis here.

So anyway, here are the two links I'm about talk about... first up is the promo material for Commando, Code Name: Snake Eyes...
http://www.superherohype.com/news/gijoenews.php?id=6958
In case you don't recognize him, that's Ray Park under there. Darth Maul. I'll be super-blunt here: I'm glad he's in a role that's pure action and zero-dialogue. First and foremost, the guy is a stunt-man. I think he got a bit of a big head when he stepped into the Darth Maul role (because they gave him a couple of lines, next thing you know, he's an actor and playing opposite the likes of Ian McKellan?!) On the other hand, since this is Snake Eyes we're talking about, the mystery man who doesn't talk but kicks all kinds of serious ass... well... Ray Park is certain to bring the required physicality to the role.

As for the photos... I'm so freaking tired of people who say he looks like a Power Ranger. What the hell is wrong with people? I think the suit looks like it stepped right out of the comics. They got everything right from the weird horizontal visor over his eyes, the utility belts with knives. Hell, even the serrated edge at the hilt of his sword is there just like the accessory from the action figure!
On the flip side, what leaves me scratching my head is why movie designers like to do sculpted muscle suits so much. If they want to do the armoured look, then do armour. But don't do this rubbery faux-muscle thing, it does kind of seem weird when you're aiming for a serious special-ops military action film. I'm also not terribly thrilled with his ninja clan symbol on his arm in BRIGHT RED... It's the second most silly thing I've seen in movies (the first silliest was the BRIGHT RED heart on Cpl. Hicks' chest in Aliens. Not the stealthiest choice in the world, you know.

The second is Counter-Intelligence Agent, Code Name: Scarlett
http://www.joblo.com/excl-gi-joes-scarlett
I've seen a lot of comments about the "oh no, she's all in black... just like X-Men and Batman." Well, sorry to say, but look at it this way, for a group of elite operatives, the original Joe designs were that military-looking either. If anything, I think the new Scarlett uniform is pretty awesome. These are soldiers heading into battle, they'll need all the protection they can get so the armour makes sense and low-profile colours make a lot of sense. In fact, let's take a closer look:
The material appears to be a kevlar weave of some kind, probably not real, but it would suggest it's tear-resistant. And did anybody else besides me notice that her back and front torso armour is held in place with straps at the shoulders and waist? Yup, if you look carefully at the tan+grey ensemble on the original cartoon designs, there it is. And she's armed with the hi-tech cross-bow gun, also from the cartoon and action figure. If anything I'm even more pleased with this costume than I am with Snake Eyes.

But the simple fact is, this will all come down to execution. We won't know if the movie will suck until we're right there at the theatre (or in our living rooms with the DVD). I wish people would just relax.

Ume-boshi Chazuke

There it is. I didn't have anything to go with anything in the fridge so I broke open the package of umeboshi I had lying around. Danny Choo would have you know that this is a super-common super-convenience food in Japan. If you've got rice (and any self-respecting Asian has some on hand) then one of these packets turns a plain bowl of rice into a meal.
Interestingly, I noted that this particular 3-pack appears to be intended for the international market. Not only did it have the usual Canadian nutrition sticker added, but the package itself has a fair amount of English text. On the back of the wrapper there's even a cute blurb explaning kabuki make-up design Nagatanien uses as its trademark.
This is what the content looks like. The ingredients on the wrapper (also helpfully in English) lists about what you'd expect: salt, rice cracker, MSG, (real!?) pickled plum, green tea powder perilla leaf, kelp powder, a bunch of chemicals I cannot identify...
The packet specifies 5oz of boiling water should be added when you drop this on top of rice. But since I didn't have a measuring cup handy, I just sort of eye-balled enough water to make it soupy. I'm a little bit disappointed that it's not quite as colourful as the photo on the wrapper. I mean, it's supposed to be green like green tea... but it looked rather bland to me. The taste was nothing surprising. Considering the amount of salt in this, it pretty much tasted exactly as I imagined any kind of instant meal tastes like. I've got 2 more packets...

Reaction: Soulstorm (knee-jerk)

Good lord, I heard there were bugs but I had no idea how bad it would be. I'm not a picky gamer - I mean, I'm no hardcore gamer who will nit-pick the tiniest detail. But for Soulstorm, even I saw these problems right away.

After big time successful expansions like Winter Assault and Dark Crusade, you figure you can't really go wrong when you release a new one. It's like sports games - once you have a winning formula, all you really do is tweak the stats a little, throw in a few new features, and you're milking the franchise on the gaming public every year, right?

No! I didn't have time to sit down and go through the main game tonight so I just quickly checked out the skirmish mode. In order to get a good feel for the changes, I decided to play a race I was already familiar with: Imperial Guard. I'm so familiar with them, I even noticed the little tweaks like the Chimera tank now carries only 2 squads instead of 3. But what about those bugs?

For one thing, in my first skirmish, one of my squads got stuck while rounding a corner! Part of the squad went on ahead to their destination, but the rest were sort of in gaming limbo. Somehow the game AI had moved their bodies into an area of the map that was invalid so there they were, trapped for the remainder of the game. And this didn't just happen once - but several times! During the same freaking match!

In fact, collision detection not only sucks, but holy smokes, it's non-existent! I had previously briefly skimmed the complaints all over Relic's Dawn of War forum. Seems everybody by now has noticed the line-of-sight looks weird. Weapons fire not only goes through terrian, but right through units themselves (if a turret is on top of a vehicle, and the target is below, the weapon flare will disappear into the vehicle hull and then emerge underneath). Wow! So hi-tech!

*sigh* On the bright side, Relic is hard at work building the first major patch and hope it'll be available soon (it's been in testing almost a full 2 weeks now, according to their latest updated message). I, for one, can't wait.

weekend haul (again?)

DC Direct finally released their second series of Justice League of America figures a few weeks ago. I swear, I think there's some kind of racketeering going on between the different comic shops around town. One store has only a stack of Batman figures on the pegs, while another has only a bunch of Hawkgirl pieces. The one I went to today had neither of those but a selection of the bad-guys who are part of the line-up.Amazo is one of those legacy villains who keep popping up whenever DC editors want to make fans realize the JLA are not invincible. Who can blame them, it's an android who basically fights back with all the JLA's powers... sort of like the DC version of Marvel's The Super Skrull. Heck they both even have that pointy hood pattern on their foreheads. But despite the threat, Amazo also happens to have a goofy name and an even goofier costume (where else to get a topless android in green tights but the Silver Age?). And that is why I call him a "legacy" villain.Admirably enough, Ed Benes' take on Amazo brought a new level of creepiness. And the figure comes with a neat destroyed-torso option (the chest plate comes off). The promo material for the figure also showed the head plate is supposed to come off but for the life of me, I can't seem to take mine off. And I'm afraid of breaking it.

Anyway, besides this dude, I also grabbed the first collected edition of Nova, which was a lead-off from the Annihilation event and also tied into the Conquest follow-up. Nova, as a character, is conspicuously absent from the Conquest proper mini-series which features Quaser and Starlord, both of whom were bit-players in the initial Annihilation story.

Finally, I also finally picked up Dawn of War: Soulstorm. I've been putting it off since I've heard there were several show-stopper bugs in the game and Relic has been buzzing about releasing a major patch on their forums. Also, it retails $40 for a mere expansion to a 4-year-old game. That's ridiculous. However, tonight Futureshop was having their Customer Appreciation event so knocking 10% of retail made the buy a little easier to swallow. I'll do a follow-up blog post when I get into it.

Reaction: The Band's Visit

I saw another one of those little known gems again last night. The Band's Visit is, in short, a slice-of-life film about the experience of a small group of ordinary people lost in a strange land. An Egyptian ceremonial police band has been invited to Israel to perform at a newly opened Arab Cultural Centre. However, due to a logistical error, the arrives at the airport without anyone to pick them up. So off they go looking for help.

With what little English they know, the Arabic group stumble their way along until they wind up in a small rural town which unsurprisingly has very little in the way of hotels or public transportation. The band finds that their only recourse now is to find a place to stay the night.

Through their encounters, we slowly learn about several of the members. One, who at first appears to be an arrogant but smooth-talking womanizer turns out to be a pleasant fellow willing to help an awkward local teen score with a girl. A tired and regretful second-in-command finds inspiration to complete his concerto in a most unlikely place. And grouchy lonely old band leader confronts his own past with the help of a kind local woman willing to listen.

And as the film winds down (the morning after), just as suddenly as they arrived the previous afternoon, the band disappears and makes their way to their performance. I suppose that made for a debate among my fellow movie-goers. I enjoy these vignette-style tales about ordinary people. Nothing has to conclude in order to tell a story. Life, more often than not, is about the moments in between events.

This is not a Hollywood movie in any capacity. It's not something I can seriously recommend to anybody who's not willing to look beyond the surface of a movie. I sound pretentious but I know some people who won't even watch an animated feature because "it's a cartoon" and by definition, they cannot take it seriously. What I mean is that this film looks at the way people see each other. In fact, it speaks volumes about small-town people, which is far more universal that Hebrews versus Arabs. This movie could have very easily have been about a group of English performers stuck in rural Quebec, and it the stories of them would have unraveled in a very similar fashion.

For such an exploration of human natures, I give this film a thumbs up. However, for everything else. Well, a movie is a movie and therefore must at the end of all things, be entertaining. And while it did have several amusing moments, was not particularly consistent with its pace. It's most definitely a mood-film.